Well, the long-awaited first day happened. After years of preparing and months of thinking through how to make sure my life was ready to be a doctoral student, the first day of class came and went. Maybe it was because I was very prepared, but it seemed much less scary than I imagined it would . I've looked at most of the syllabi at this point, and I'm not scared. They seem on par with the amount of work I've always done. I'm glad I didn't get rid of my part-time job or lose too much sleep. Today's class was fun (yay for small class sizes and finally being in the inner-sanctum of know-it-alls), but it wasn't hard. I keep reminding myself that maybe by the end of the week I will realize I'm in over my head. Or maybe I'm actually ready for this. Maybe the hammer isn't going to fall this semester. We will see.
This is not to say it won't be incredibly time-consuming or that I won't wish that I was not in grad school at some point. But working most of my days and nights and weekends is how my life has been since the fourth grade, except for a few years when I had a regular job and I filled the boring hours of free-time with much more interesting community service. So maybe my life really is ready for my doctorate and maybe this won't be the most challenging two years of my life.
Either way, today was fun. I got to talk about interesting things, read about interesting things, and dream about all of the ideas I can write about and questions I can answer. Being a social scientist is going to rock.
Update: By day 4, I felt like my research agenda was completely useless.
Update 2: By day 7, I felt okay again. Let's see if I live on a 3-day sin curve for the rest of grad school. I'm hoping it's a few more than 3 days, but hey.
Monday, August 29, 2016
Friday, August 26, 2016
Getting Up for Grad School
When my husband was in grad school and I was working, I would get up at 5:45, get ready for work, go to work, prep my classroom, and have taught my first reading group or two before my husband was even out of bed. Since he went straight through from college to undergrad, I wondered if he'd be able to get up for a "real" job. Obviously, this was a pretty condescending position for me to have about my kind, responsible husband.
Fast forward to now, and the tables have turned. Now he's working and I'm in school, with about six years of full-time work under my belt. But now I'm the one who's struggling to get up while he's up, dressed, and out the door. Seems like grad school is the real culprit.
Sleeping in sounds great, until you realize it actually makes you feel crappy on at least three levels: the level that tells you you are being an irresponsible adult, the level that tells you this is not a Saturday and everyone who has a real job is already hustling, and the level that tells you you have way too much to do to be snoozing. This summer I wanted to figure out how I was going to get up, get fed, exercise, get ready, and be "in the office" by 8 A.M.
As it turns out, it only took two steps.
Step 1: Alarmy
Alarmy is the best app I could find to get me out of bed. When I was a kid I had a little analog clock with no snooze button. With that baby I always got up for school when it went off because I knew if I didn't there were no second chances. I didn't have my first snooze button until college, when the downward slide of mornings began. Alarmy takes away the snooze button and forces me to get out of bed for it to turn off by requiring a task rather than a simple button slap. Mine is set so that I cannot snooze it, and I have to take a picture of a painting in my bathroom to turn it off. It has easily gotten me up at 6:15 every day since I started it, even when I really, really didn't want to.
Step 2: Re-vamped Morning Routine
One of the greatest things I learned being an elementary school teacher was how much I enjoy routines. Not that I don't love being spontaneous. But when I want to be efficient and feel accomplished, routines help me out a lot. The problem with my routine during the last academic year was one half not getting out of bed and one half not including transition times. It also made me do something I hate as soon as I got up: exercise. I wanted to wash my face and drink coffee, not pretend to kickbox.
(I have spent way too much time in my adult life trying to figure out how to incorporate physical activity into my life. I'm not a fan of exercising just to exercise, I never played sports, and I had been pretty fit (read as thin not actually healthy) so I didn't really care. But I figured this was not sustainable (and I realized I had just been thin not actually healthy and now I wasn't thin anymore either), so I've been slowly figuring it out over the last 3 years. And yeah, after 3 years it's STILL a work in progress!)
Anyhow, suffice it to say, the thought of exercising did not make me want to get up. The thought of coffee was slightly more motivating. So my new routine gives me what I want. And it has plenty of transition times. Before, it was like get up at 6:15, exercise from 6:15-6:45, shower 6:45-7:00, etc. Well, guess what, you can't start exercising the minute you get out of bed and you can't get into the shower as soon as you finish exercising because you are too hot. So it failed every day and then I just stopped exercising. So now I have plenty of transition time.
Weekday Morning Routine
6:15-6:30 - Get up, put on exercise clothes
6:30-6:45 - Drink coffee, eat breakfast, download news podcast, skim the paper
6:45-7:15 - Exercise
7:15-7:25 - Feed cats, make kefir smoothie, make bed, cool down
7:25-7:40 - Shower
7:40-8:00 - Get dressed
8:00 - in the "office" if working for home or leave to commute
So far, it's working. Since I started it in the summer, and I've stuck to it, I think it has a pretty good likelihood of working out through the semester. We'll see.
So, if you're in graduate school or are in some other situation and you are finding it is hard to get up, you are not alone. You are also not a worse adult than people that get up just fine in the morning. You may just need to think about what motivates you to get up (e.g. coffee) and use some kind of app that really gets you out of bed and prevents your brain from tricking you into staying in bed.
Good luck!
Fast forward to now, and the tables have turned. Now he's working and I'm in school, with about six years of full-time work under my belt. But now I'm the one who's struggling to get up while he's up, dressed, and out the door. Seems like grad school is the real culprit.
Sleeping in sounds great, until you realize it actually makes you feel crappy on at least three levels: the level that tells you you are being an irresponsible adult, the level that tells you this is not a Saturday and everyone who has a real job is already hustling, and the level that tells you you have way too much to do to be snoozing. This summer I wanted to figure out how I was going to get up, get fed, exercise, get ready, and be "in the office" by 8 A.M.
As it turns out, it only took two steps.
Step 1: Alarmy
Alarmy is the best app I could find to get me out of bed. When I was a kid I had a little analog clock with no snooze button. With that baby I always got up for school when it went off because I knew if I didn't there were no second chances. I didn't have my first snooze button until college, when the downward slide of mornings began. Alarmy takes away the snooze button and forces me to get out of bed for it to turn off by requiring a task rather than a simple button slap. Mine is set so that I cannot snooze it, and I have to take a picture of a painting in my bathroom to turn it off. It has easily gotten me up at 6:15 every day since I started it, even when I really, really didn't want to.
Step 2: Re-vamped Morning Routine
One of the greatest things I learned being an elementary school teacher was how much I enjoy routines. Not that I don't love being spontaneous. But when I want to be efficient and feel accomplished, routines help me out a lot. The problem with my routine during the last academic year was one half not getting out of bed and one half not including transition times. It also made me do something I hate as soon as I got up: exercise. I wanted to wash my face and drink coffee, not pretend to kickbox.
(I have spent way too much time in my adult life trying to figure out how to incorporate physical activity into my life. I'm not a fan of exercising just to exercise, I never played sports, and I had been pretty fit (read as thin not actually healthy) so I didn't really care. But I figured this was not sustainable (and I realized I had just been thin not actually healthy and now I wasn't thin anymore either), so I've been slowly figuring it out over the last 3 years. And yeah, after 3 years it's STILL a work in progress!)
Anyhow, suffice it to say, the thought of exercising did not make me want to get up. The thought of coffee was slightly more motivating. So my new routine gives me what I want. And it has plenty of transition times. Before, it was like get up at 6:15, exercise from 6:15-6:45, shower 6:45-7:00, etc. Well, guess what, you can't start exercising the minute you get out of bed and you can't get into the shower as soon as you finish exercising because you are too hot. So it failed every day and then I just stopped exercising. So now I have plenty of transition time.
Weekday Morning Routine
6:15-6:30 - Get up, put on exercise clothes
6:30-6:45 - Drink coffee, eat breakfast, download news podcast, skim the paper
6:45-7:15 - Exercise
7:15-7:25 - Feed cats, make kefir smoothie, make bed, cool down
7:25-7:40 - Shower
7:40-8:00 - Get dressed
8:00 - in the "office" if working for home or leave to commute
So far, it's working. Since I started it in the summer, and I've stuck to it, I think it has a pretty good likelihood of working out through the semester. We'll see.
So, if you're in graduate school or are in some other situation and you are finding it is hard to get up, you are not alone. You are also not a worse adult than people that get up just fine in the morning. You may just need to think about what motivates you to get up (e.g. coffee) and use some kind of app that really gets you out of bed and prevents your brain from tricking you into staying in bed.
Good luck!
Wednesday, August 24, 2016
Self-Care is Radical
The other day I was driving and heard a radio commercial for a pharmacy's urgent care clinic. It insinuated that you just don't have time to get sick and if you go to their urgent care you'll be back to picking up your kids from soccer, making dinner, and rocking it at meetings lickety-split. I'm concerned about this framing. It wasn't, "oh no, too bad you're sick, we can help." Instead, it was you don't have time to let your body go through an inevitable and natural process that is picking up a bug. This pharmacy echoed what we are being told from so many angles: you do not have time for a break, you need to be working. And if you're a woman, you need to be making sure that everyone you care for is sticking to it too.
This all-in worker is not a new American ideal. In her 1977 landmark work, Men and Women of the Corporation, Rosabeth Moss Kanter describes this person as the "ideal worker" (not by her own definition, but by that of the corporation culture). The ideal worker is a person whose whole focus is on work. They work hard at work. They bring home work. They think about work in their spare time. A lot of their social time is work-related. They are okay with their vacation being interrupted by work or not taking a vacation at all.
Kanter discusses how in the original corporate culture this meant that women really couldn't be ideal workers and attempted to exclude them from the market. Predominately white middle- and upper-class women did unpaid labor for their family and for their husband's corporation (e.g. organizing charity events and networking socials). Women did all this so their husbands could be ideal workers and not worry about things like chores or children. Corporations believed that women could never be ideal workers because they wouldn't be able to avoid thinking about or actually helping their children, aging parents, or community efforts. Hence, they largely excluded women from being a part of corporations and when they were included, it was in positions that were routine and time limited (i.e. not requiring an ideal worker). Clearly this is only one corner of the market and excludes many groups of people, but Moss Kanter's work was one hint to the bind we are in as corporate culture takes over everything - including social work, education, and other women's fields.
This all-in worker is not a new American ideal. In her 1977 landmark work, Men and Women of the Corporation, Rosabeth Moss Kanter describes this person as the "ideal worker" (not by her own definition, but by that of the corporation culture). The ideal worker is a person whose whole focus is on work. They work hard at work. They bring home work. They think about work in their spare time. A lot of their social time is work-related. They are okay with their vacation being interrupted by work or not taking a vacation at all.
Kanter discusses how in the original corporate culture this meant that women really couldn't be ideal workers and attempted to exclude them from the market. Predominately white middle- and upper-class women did unpaid labor for their family and for their husband's corporation (e.g. organizing charity events and networking socials). Women did all this so their husbands could be ideal workers and not worry about things like chores or children. Corporations believed that women could never be ideal workers because they wouldn't be able to avoid thinking about or actually helping their children, aging parents, or community efforts. Hence, they largely excluded women from being a part of corporations and when they were included, it was in positions that were routine and time limited (i.e. not requiring an ideal worker). Clearly this is only one corner of the market and excludes many groups of people, but Moss Kanter's work was one hint to the bind we are in as corporate culture takes over everything - including social work, education, and other women's fields.
This corporate culture is not designed to make sure people have lots of emotional energy. So it's not designed for social workers. It is up to us to re-claim the fact that we need self-care to do our work. It is also up to us to acknowledge that self-care is the only way we will have space to connect with others, to critically analyze our situation, and to be creative. Not prioritizing self-care is one way, I believe, that the corporate take-over of the helping professions prevents us from focusing on macro-issues. Working on macro-issues requires consciousness-raising and organization which means time, space, and relationship-building. These cannot be done by the "ideal worker" in the sense of corporate culture.
So self-care isn't about being selfish or not doing your best as some organizations and corporations might lead us to believe. Self-care isn't just about healing from trauma, vicarious trauma, or compassion fatigue (although it is those things). Self-care isn't just about re-charging so that you can do more work (although it is that too). Full and complete self-care is radical. By taking space to reflect, to think, to create, to learn, you can consider how you want to commit your energy and how to stay true to our ethical code. Learning about topics and participating in activities unrelated to work can open new ways of thinking about work-related problems. This creativity is what we need to crack the tough problems we face in the helping professions. Becoming more robotic will not help us help our clients raise their own consciousness and find solutions. Becoming all-consumed by one topic will not let us exercise our creativity to consider ways to break down power differentials. Being so consumed by our work encourages linear rather than circular thinking. In this way, self-care allows us to explore radical solutions to our broken systems and our societal problems. It allows us to feel like the smart, capable people we are.
Self-care is a radical goal in our "work work work!" society. It is also extremely difficult to pull off with so many people and problems - about which we care deeply - competing for our limited time. I look forward to writing a few posts about how I'm trying to commit to self-care so that I can be a better social worker and a better all around person. Hopefully, we'll hear some other ideas here as well.
Saturday, August 20, 2016
Notes on the Blog Title and Plan
Hello!
So I know the name of this blog is Rad Social Work. And I really am going to write a lot about radical social work and my developing research that supports radical and feminist practice. I'm going to write a lot about feminism as a good frame for social work and try to use this as a space to meet other feminist social workers. BUT I also chose "rad" social work instead of something like "feminist" social work or "radical" social work because of the nostalgic use of the word "rad" to mean cool and free. Meaning, I'm going to post what I want. Right now, a lot of that is going to be about being in graduate school, since I've been spending my summer in a mental boot camp as I prepare for my most challenging years of my academic career. And I will probably post cute pictures of my pets sometimes.
So not everything is going to satisfy the radical part of rad. This may be an unnecessary disclaimer. But I'm one of those people who wants to be clear that I've thought through some assumptions and pitfalls and tried to make the best decision I can. Maybe I'll get enough feedback that I change the name some day or maybe I'll come up with a more catchy title. But for now, I really just want to write and don't want to get too hung up on the title. I think it's a good one. If I find it's not, I'll change it.
I will write some about being a radical person in the real world. I'll explain how I'm really only radical in some ways. Some of my way more rad friends would say I'm not that radical. In many ways, I'm actually pretty square. Like being a feminist, living radically can come in many shapes and is not well-defined. A lot of people will try to define it, and that's a good exercise. I'll work to define it how I define it for me and we can talk about what feminist means to me versus other folks. But my scholarship and the changes I hope to make in the world are pushing it away from patriarchy and capitalism, and working to reroute our society from neoliberalism and as far as I understand it that's radical. I wish we could just get rid of these systems of control today. But that is not a real thing that can happen. Even though I hate it, change takes a lot of time and all change has unintended consequences. But we can participate in moving toward change, we can be a voice in the crowd, and we can work together to set up a different world. In fact, we have no other choice. I'll write more about my beliefs and over time we'll get to know each other.
I just wanted to write this because I don't really want to be facing too many expectations for this blog. I want to write what I think will be helpful. Being efficient in my life and being an effective professional/ scholar are important to me. I believe these are ways to make progress toward breaking down oppressive systems. So I'm going to write about that. I'm also going to write about ideas for actually breaking down or at least questioning and chipping away at oppressive systems.
In short, be ready for some things to relate directly to radical social work and for some things to not be. I'm probably going to focus more on process than on product because I'm very interested in the way we social workers work, not just what we objectively accomplish. In many situations, I think the way you work, the way you live, the way you are is more important than what you actually do. But of course, I think they're both important, so I'm going to write about both.
Thanks,
Kess
So I know the name of this blog is Rad Social Work. And I really am going to write a lot about radical social work and my developing research that supports radical and feminist practice. I'm going to write a lot about feminism as a good frame for social work and try to use this as a space to meet other feminist social workers. BUT I also chose "rad" social work instead of something like "feminist" social work or "radical" social work because of the nostalgic use of the word "rad" to mean cool and free. Meaning, I'm going to post what I want. Right now, a lot of that is going to be about being in graduate school, since I've been spending my summer in a mental boot camp as I prepare for my most challenging years of my academic career. And I will probably post cute pictures of my pets sometimes.
So not everything is going to satisfy the radical part of rad. This may be an unnecessary disclaimer. But I'm one of those people who wants to be clear that I've thought through some assumptions and pitfalls and tried to make the best decision I can. Maybe I'll get enough feedback that I change the name some day or maybe I'll come up with a more catchy title. But for now, I really just want to write and don't want to get too hung up on the title. I think it's a good one. If I find it's not, I'll change it.
I will write some about being a radical person in the real world. I'll explain how I'm really only radical in some ways. Some of my way more rad friends would say I'm not that radical. In many ways, I'm actually pretty square. Like being a feminist, living radically can come in many shapes and is not well-defined. A lot of people will try to define it, and that's a good exercise. I'll work to define it how I define it for me and we can talk about what feminist means to me versus other folks. But my scholarship and the changes I hope to make in the world are pushing it away from patriarchy and capitalism, and working to reroute our society from neoliberalism and as far as I understand it that's radical. I wish we could just get rid of these systems of control today. But that is not a real thing that can happen. Even though I hate it, change takes a lot of time and all change has unintended consequences. But we can participate in moving toward change, we can be a voice in the crowd, and we can work together to set up a different world. In fact, we have no other choice. I'll write more about my beliefs and over time we'll get to know each other.
I just wanted to write this because I don't really want to be facing too many expectations for this blog. I want to write what I think will be helpful. Being efficient in my life and being an effective professional/ scholar are important to me. I believe these are ways to make progress toward breaking down oppressive systems. So I'm going to write about that. I'm also going to write about ideas for actually breaking down or at least questioning and chipping away at oppressive systems.
In short, be ready for some things to relate directly to radical social work and for some things to not be. I'm probably going to focus more on process than on product because I'm very interested in the way we social workers work, not just what we objectively accomplish. In many situations, I think the way you work, the way you live, the way you are is more important than what you actually do. But of course, I think they're both important, so I'm going to write about both.
Thanks,
Kess
Friday, August 19, 2016
Introduction
Hello! I'm Kess. This is my third attempt at blogging (third time's the charm?). I am a domestic violence advocate, turned research assistant, turned community program founder, turned special ed teacher, turned social worker. Though my resume seems like a crazy journey, overall I have stuck to my core career goals which are to use information, hard work, and authentic relationships to help the community. In my personal world, I'm super happily married to my fabulous engineer husband/ best friend/ life teammate/ personal chef. I love animals, particularly my two cats and two rabbits. I would love to add a dog and llama to the mix, but I definitely don't have time for either and I don't live on a farm so... no llama. My hobbies include obsessively watching RuPaul's Drag Race and everything related to it, various needlecrafts, reading, gardening, and organizing. But mostly I work. I am currently in an MSW/PhD program and also work in program development for my local Office of Children, Youth and Families.
Next week I start my first year of doctoral classes while I simultaneously finish up my MSW (this is my second time in the Master's program rodeo having already gotten an MAT), do my concentration field placement, work my graduate assistanceship, and do a bit of work for CYF on the side. So probably the last thing I need to do is start attempting to blog again. But here are some reasons why I'm going to try anyways:
1. I want to.
2. I frame myself as a radical feminist social worker/ person (but you work for the government!! and a sometimes super oppressive part of it!! (I know, we'll get to how I reconcile that in my head at a later point and why I think rad people sometimes should work for the man)), and I think that we need more voices like that in the world. So why not add to the flotsam and jetsam that is the internet when you think you have something good to say?
3. I am a fairly systematic and organized person who at this point is super experienced at juggling a lot of various work and personal projects and starting new things. And since I'm working through my second master's degree, the thing I'm best at is learning. Hopefully, sharing my process might help someone.
4. I know some pretty cool people and if this blog gets even 50 readers, maybe they'd want to share their ideas at some point too. I'd love to help their voices be heard even louder.
5. This is one way that I can start breaking down the ivory tower. I'll probably always have at least one foot, or possibly all four appendages, in academia. But I completely refuse to do so if my ideas just stay there. That breaks my core value of helping the community. So hopefully this blog will be one way to build a community where I can share these ideas and help other people help their communities in one big radical chain of helping.
So here are my goals to make this blog different than some of the other resources for graduate students and social workers that I've enjoyed and used online.
1. I am going to REALLY try to avoid whining about graduate school. Earning my doctorate has been a lifetime goal for me, and I am incredibly privileged to be in a position to do this. I am here for many reasons but definitely my unearned privilege as a white person raised by educated parents (who are also white and benefit from tons of unearned privilege). I am here because I'm married to a person who makes enough money to enable five years of working at less than my earning potential a difficult choice. I am here because I left direct practice where kids whined and rolled their eyes and required a ton of patience to help them learn (and I loved them for it) and left the really hard work to other people. I am here because a lot of people have helped and supported me. I'm here because I had access to some awesome opportunities. So yeah, grad school is going to be busy, and I'm going to work all the time. But I've always worked all the time, so that's not really new for me. What's different is that now I sit and drink coffee and work at my super cool desk and read and write interesting things and can pee whenever I want (which any teacher will tell you is one of the best things about not teaching). So I am lucky. I am extraordinarily privileged. And I am not going to whine about that on this blog.
2. There really isn't a lot of online info directly for social workers. I want more podcasts, blogs, and resources to enjoy. So I'm going to try to expand the resource base a bit.
3. There are few resources for feminist social workers online or anywhere. I am enjoying doing research on feminist social work and how we can change the way social workers experience their work using feminist strategies. I want to talk about that and provide as much information as I can because I strongly believe we need an ignited, educated, active feminist movement in America, particularly in historically women-dominated fields including social work and teaching.
Okay, so that's the plan. We'll see how it goes. It may die immediately, or it may help me share and collaborate my way through the next four years. So read if you want to, and I'll try to keep writing.
Cheers,
Kess
Next week I start my first year of doctoral classes while I simultaneously finish up my MSW (this is my second time in the Master's program rodeo having already gotten an MAT), do my concentration field placement, work my graduate assistanceship, and do a bit of work for CYF on the side. So probably the last thing I need to do is start attempting to blog again. But here are some reasons why I'm going to try anyways:
1. I want to.
2. I frame myself as a radical feminist social worker/ person (but you work for the government!! and a sometimes super oppressive part of it!! (I know, we'll get to how I reconcile that in my head at a later point and why I think rad people sometimes should work for the man)), and I think that we need more voices like that in the world. So why not add to the flotsam and jetsam that is the internet when you think you have something good to say?
3. I am a fairly systematic and organized person who at this point is super experienced at juggling a lot of various work and personal projects and starting new things. And since I'm working through my second master's degree, the thing I'm best at is learning. Hopefully, sharing my process might help someone.
4. I know some pretty cool people and if this blog gets even 50 readers, maybe they'd want to share their ideas at some point too. I'd love to help their voices be heard even louder.
5. This is one way that I can start breaking down the ivory tower. I'll probably always have at least one foot, or possibly all four appendages, in academia. But I completely refuse to do so if my ideas just stay there. That breaks my core value of helping the community. So hopefully this blog will be one way to build a community where I can share these ideas and help other people help their communities in one big radical chain of helping.
So here are my goals to make this blog different than some of the other resources for graduate students and social workers that I've enjoyed and used online.
1. I am going to REALLY try to avoid whining about graduate school. Earning my doctorate has been a lifetime goal for me, and I am incredibly privileged to be in a position to do this. I am here for many reasons but definitely my unearned privilege as a white person raised by educated parents (who are also white and benefit from tons of unearned privilege). I am here because I'm married to a person who makes enough money to enable five years of working at less than my earning potential a difficult choice. I am here because I left direct practice where kids whined and rolled their eyes and required a ton of patience to help them learn (and I loved them for it) and left the really hard work to other people. I am here because a lot of people have helped and supported me. I'm here because I had access to some awesome opportunities. So yeah, grad school is going to be busy, and I'm going to work all the time. But I've always worked all the time, so that's not really new for me. What's different is that now I sit and drink coffee and work at my super cool desk and read and write interesting things and can pee whenever I want (which any teacher will tell you is one of the best things about not teaching). So I am lucky. I am extraordinarily privileged. And I am not going to whine about that on this blog.
2. There really isn't a lot of online info directly for social workers. I want more podcasts, blogs, and resources to enjoy. So I'm going to try to expand the resource base a bit.
3. There are few resources for feminist social workers online or anywhere. I am enjoying doing research on feminist social work and how we can change the way social workers experience their work using feminist strategies. I want to talk about that and provide as much information as I can because I strongly believe we need an ignited, educated, active feminist movement in America, particularly in historically women-dominated fields including social work and teaching.
Okay, so that's the plan. We'll see how it goes. It may die immediately, or it may help me share and collaborate my way through the next four years. So read if you want to, and I'll try to keep writing.
Cheers,
Kess
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